I am so confused. School is coming down to the wire and i am making sure my main priority this year is my books. No time for other mess ya dig! So being realistic, im tryna make sure everything else is in place. money for my tuition, spending money, supplies, transportation, food, food, food, and also my men issues.
Aiight as much as i can admit i am not over KK but, i dont wanna be wrapped up in him either. there is just too much i am not getting from him. And it wouldnt be so bad if there wasnt someone else, that it doing everything he is not doing.
I have this special someone that has been under my nose for the longest time and ive just been ignoring him. But now my interest has peaked and I have to decide what I want to do. I mean, he has been my friend for about 4 years now. I mean a continuous friend that has never betrayed me. A friend who i have never doubted. From the day i met him i knew he was a genuinely good person, kind, giving, and intelligent. He just has so many unignorable positive traits and its killing me. I know that he wants me and I know I love him, but I dont know if I want to make this more than just the close friendship love that we have.
I mean, for one, i did used to mess with someone who is his very close friend, and also, i dont want to mess up this good friendship that me and him have or start anything between him and the other guy. Also there is the distance thing. And one final thing that i must be honest and frank about is the physical contact. I have grown accustomed to having KK sleeping beside me most nights. How is that gonna play out if I start messing with this friend? I still gonna long for that physical touch and I need to search myself to determine if I even want to attempt that! I am just sooo...confused. I dont want to regret this decision. Careful consideration, much conversation, and prayer will get me through it. AMEN